Doing Well

Chukka is definitely getting better.

I got this email from Magda:

"The nurse spoke to us at length. He said (to all three of us) that Chukka was really lucky, that a train accident is usually fatal. He said she got there so quickly that she lost less blood than many accident patients, when they have severance of such major arteries.

"He spoke to mum and I alone in the corridor before we left and assured us that us being there is really important for Chukka's recovery and spirits. He said again that she was doing better than many amputees he has seen. He could not say how long she will be there. It sounds like a long while longer, though, I think. She has these other operations and some rehab to come before she can be moved.

"The Marienheim is really a godsend, it is so much easier to prepare little meals and keep food in the fridge and so on. And everyone there is in the same boat, so you just say hello and again hello when you see them in the hospital."


[Eliza again]
Magda doesn't say whether Chukka is doing better than average physically or mentally, but I suspect both. The mental component is really crucial -- depression is a major risk with amputation and a patient who gave up now would not have the persistence to make it through rehab and so to start seeing improvement. And as you all know, that's where her friends and community come in! Just to know how supported and loved she is, is really important.

I went over to my mother's place to pick up the mail and I found some photo albums. Mostly from when we were kids. I would have liked some pictures of her as an adult, but at some point my mother gave up and just started putting pics in boxes, and they are much harder to thumb through quickly. I hope to scan some in soon!

Where we are today

Just an update from Innsbruck.

Chukka is still in a lot of pain and discomfort, but has improved so much since I first saw her. Last night (I got here again yesterday) she was feeling a nauseous. I told the nurse (using the slangy word which might be translated as 'she feels like barfing' -- not how I would usually talk to a nurse! -- he told me the echt Deutsch) and she got something for that. I was also able to ask what the evening programme was (teeth cleaning, cool wash, sleeping meds) -- it seems to help to speak German, although all in hospital have some English.

The Marienheim hostel is really great, the person in the office (volunteer?) was really nice, it is spotless and very 'homey' with table cloths in the little dining room, lots of dishes and pots and, of course, four bins under the sink so we can recycle our plastic, paper, and compost. There is a big fridge with little baskets so we can keep things and label them. I brought my own sheets and towel, they hire some so Mum has those, and then we have a lovely room with a table and so on. It is really about 2 or 3 minutes to the hospital, and is a wonderful facility for our situation. They have a library (mostly German) and even an umbrella stand. In our situation, it could not be better, really.

The last fews days have been very rainy, but today the sun is out, so we can walk around again, filling in the time until visiting hours, and running errands and keeping ourselves sane. The rain fell as snow on the peaks, so the scenery looks a bit more dramatic.

Over and out from Innsbruck.

Magda and Sally

Reading Cards

I am sure that Mum and Magda will read the cards again to Chukka as soon as she is ready. And even though Chukka might not have taken in the exact words on each particular cards, I am sure that she has taken in the enormous love and caring that they contain. We tend to think the mind is very important and that until something has gone through the process of thinking, it hasn't been understood. But actually, the body and heart can take in so much before the mind even gets the key in the ignition.

I know in my heart that having your cards there and present means a lot to her, and I know that they have made a difference. I know they are already helping her and that they will continue to help her and to let her feel less alone. I knew from the beginning that having this community there for her was going to be tremednously important, and there is no doubt in my mind you have already made a tremendous contribution.

Another way the message gets through is that Mum and Magdacan read and hear your words and know what you've said. We, her birth family, are so much stronger for knowing how many freinds she has and how much caring there is for her, and that strength and awareness is there when Mum and Magda speak to her. It would be so much harder without you. Your love gives us courage, and our courage gives her strength.

Do remember that this is a slow process and she is on a different time scale. Have faith that your giving and love can persist, it doean't need to get there precisely at eight o'clock sharp. We can send messages around the world instantly, we can check for updates four times a day, but the body and soul still heal the way they have for aeons, at a pace more attuned to the rocks and the trees.

More from Mum

Another email from Mum. It sounds like she is less alone in the Marienheim, which is one of the things Magda and I hoped would happen. Also sounds like Chukka is more and more there. It just takes time, there is a lot of healing yet to do.

Sally writes:

"I'm sorry I didn't write yesterday. I meant to, but breakfast lasted longer than I thought. The Marienheim serves breakfast Tuesday, Wed and Thurs. A volunteer sits at each table and I was engaged in a rather lengthy conversation.

"I had decided to go the the art museum. There was a heavy rain and on the way I thought I'd pop into the Servittenkirche ....Morning Mass. Lasted half an hour. I wondered if a tone deaf person could become a priest in Austria.

"Chukka speaks up for her needs. She has to use a breathing apparatus for at least an hour a day. It obstructs her vision so that she cannot see any nurse and this causes panic. We have both explained with a request that someone remain in the room to respond to her wave.

"She asked me to state that she is touched by the cards and letters, the videos and DVDs the team has sent. Magda or I read her every letter. She cannot yet respond, but we are saving them. I have always been proud of Chukka but I truly admire her for her grit and determination to come through. I at least can touch her and curl her fingers in mine, change the washcloth on her forhead.

"Did you know that the Dippers--Ursa Major and Minor are the Grosse Wagen and Klenie Wagen [Big Wagon and Little Wagon - Eliza] Or perhaps grosser und kleiner. I only paid attention to the wagen part."

combating boredom

I spoke to Sally. Chukka is still seeing double. Thanks to all who sent dvds adn videos, seems like it is too soon for her to enjoy them.

I am taking a little tape cassette walkman that I have. I bought new earphones (large, for comfort) and looked for tapes. Turns out they are no longer for sale in UK shops, so I am taking some we have. My tape deck for recording from CD is not working, so just have to manage.

Dont' know if this will be of interest to her. If it is, I will let you know, in case you have a source of cassette tapes.

Magda

Cards received

Before I left we had had delivery of two piles of cards, which had been sent to the original address, and which were re-directed. So if you sent a card, I think it probably got there. We read them out to Chukka, and also read some which Mum and I brought by hand. She could look at the front pictures. She liked the messages, but I think she will need to read the cards again later to really take them in. Mum has them all in a safe spot so we can give them to her when she is no longer in ICU.

Thank you everyone who has sent something or is standing by to send something in the future, including messages here.

I will be back in Austria on Thursday.

Magda

Mum moving to a better location

Email from Sally:

"I have moved to the Marianheim which ... is in the house with the bright teal window frames. There is a kitchenwith stove and frig. However, we have to make own beds, keep place tidy, usw. They serve breakfat on Tues, Wed, Thur. Otherwise, on our own. Imade trip after trip with the luggage since it's only threee blocks away. Ihad lunch and a rest before the last trip. It is incredibly hot here. I bet Chukka is really suffering with the heat.

"The MArianheim has a garden and I saw picnic tables with folks using them. I think a garden is a great facility. ...

"As you see, I made it to the Internet Palace and with the help of the crib sheet can send messages."

Magda says:

"This place is run by nuns (?) and was suggested by the doctor as they run these apartments for people visiting relatives in hsopital long term. This sounds ideal, just next to hospital."

Eliza says:

Last I heard, Chukka's fever was down somewhat. The doctor says, she gets a little better everyday.

Healing at the Pace of the Body

I'm sure I'm not the only one who was so excited to hear Chukka was speaking, that I forgot how seriously she has been injured and that her healing will take some time. Although modern medicine can do much to support her, ultimately, she can only heal as fast as her body can manage, and even in these days of the Internet, that remains slow. She is, of course, in a great deal of pain and remains heavily medicated, so although she is conscious, she is focused mostly on her immediate needs and is not really ready to take in all our well wishes and cards. It is still too soon for DVDs and so on. When I think to the last time I was ill, I remember how the illness can take over everything and there is little energy for anything else. So it is with Chukka. We can still continue to send her our love and support.